Pregnancy is a beautiful thing. Bring the life of a sweet baby into this world is such a miracle. Then you get pregnant and really just want a glass of wine and to feel like a normal human being again!
Don't get me wrong I love being pregnant and the goods out weigh the bads by so much more. I'm 32 weeks pregnant though... let me bitch here people!
First symptom of doom... Bloat! Oh dear lord did I bloat like crazy! It's not the bloat you get after eating a bowl of chili. It's the type of bloat that makes you equal in size to a walrus, and as lazy as one too. I seriously bloated out so much even before I knew I was pregnant that I couldnt zip my jeans! And it was painful bloat. All I wanted to do was rip one like an oversized truck driver, but that just wasn't happening. Don't tell me I should have tried gas-x and all that stuff. I did and let me tell you I think it just made me bloat more!
Nausea... KILL ME PLEASE! I hate the feeling of having to puke. I hate even more that I never did puke (Well I did twice). Dry heaves, oh yeah! Constant nausea, of course! It sucked so much bc no matter what I ate and/or drank it did nothing to help. They say eat frequently to ease nausea. HAHA! That's funny bc when I ate it just became worse, no matter what it is that I ate.
Why Nic (ALL men) think it's ok to take pics when we feel our worst is beyond me
If you smile they quit taking pictures I found out. I'm pretty sure I wanted to puke and punch him right now
Spidey sense... AKA super smell! I smell EVERYTHING! And that's pretty cool when you have a really good smelling candle or pass by the mexican place. It's really bad when your husband wants bacon and eggs to eat, while you have your head under 100 layers of blankets and pillows trying all you can not to lose the few cookies you have kept down in the last 3 days. I think Nic started cooking what I wanted after that bc he felt bad for me cussing him out and opening all the windows and locking myself in the far room with my head almost sticking out the window in there.
ZZZZZ... I could barely get out of bed, but when I did it was to go lay on the couch. I would usually eat some sort of breakfast and fall right back to sleep. Jameson sucked every bit of energy I had out of me to help him get the move on with growing. I want him to be healthy, but I also would have liked to have the energy to stand in the shower long enough to shower instead of sit in the tub with the water coming down on me.
X-men power... Sucking the life out of me! So many times Nic and I would be walking through the grocery store, mall, or anywhere else and I was doing find. ZAP! It took less than 30 seconds for me to barely be able to stand up. I would become drained of all energy and strength instantly and it took everything I had not to just lay down on the floor beneath me. This I close to the most aweful feeling. Right after...
Dizzy spells... I hate the dizzy spells. I could be making dinner then I start to get dizzy and have to sit down for atleast half an hour, drink something, and catch my breath. And it wasnt just then. And I dont think it had anything to do with being hungry. There were several times I had just ate when I would get these aweful spells. Just came out of the blue. Or sometimes I have them all day. Not fun laying in bed feeling like the room is spinning when you haven't had a drink in 7+ months let me tell you!
Ranger training... I love when Jameson gets his little kicks and when I can watch my whole belly do the wave when he gets to moving. What I DON'T like is when he thinks it's ok to sucker punch my in the ribs, do burpies against my bladder and combatives with my stomach. That little brat hurts! There have been a few times he has gotten in a good superman punch to the gut and I thought I was going to instantly lose my dinner. Not cool baby, not cool!
Aches... Well besides the fact that Jameson has a deadly right hook, it's just sore carrying around the extra weight. So far I have gained I think 32+ pounds now. That is alot for my small frame! And I put most of it on in less than 15 weeks. Yes I love the look the extra weight has given me, but the feel of it is just painful on the ribs, back, hips and legs.
No Zzzzzs... I may be tired all the time but I think since 20 weeks I havent actually slept a single time through the entire night. 0230-0430 hits and I'm up, having to pee and eat something. EVERY SINGLE NIGHT! I'm not kidding when I say it has been like this every night for 12 weeks now. And it's not just pee, eat, sleep. Nope. Once I wake up I can't fall back to sleep for nothing. EVERYONE keeps saying 'Just wait until baby comes. You wont sleep ever.' NO SHIT! I have been around babies and I have not lived under a rock my entire life. I'm prepared for that. But I didnt realize that he would keep me up as much as he could before he even came out. Give me a break, or better yet a nap, kid!
I NEED FOOD NOW... I have been eating everything in sight since about 16 weeks. But the worst part about that is when I need to eat, I need to eat NOW! I can go from find to on my death bed from starvation in less than 5 minutes. Having snacks on hand at all times is a must!
Glow my ass... So somewhere in the world there is a woman with long shiny hair, flawless moisturized skin, great nails, and wearing heels while pregnant. I want to punch that broad! I have had breakouts over my ENTIRE body (Also I can't use the oh so popular cocoa butter lotion. Poor belly was covered in little red bumps.) dry skin like crazy, dry scalp, hairy all over (Hello Chewbacca belly!) and let me tell you about the sweats! The 'glow' must be from the reflection of the sun off the the persperation over my entire body. I create my own heat now like my husband does. Get us both in bed together and I have all the blankets thrown off me with gettnig up every 10 minutes to go roll in the snow to cool off. Thankfully the sweats have been happening to me during the winter so it's easy too cool off. If not I'm sure I would be a heat casualty.
Getting comfortable... not going to happen! I know Jameson is doing well and comfy all curled up in my belly. How do I know this? Because I can't get comfortable for nothing! I have to sleep with a body pillow between my legs and under the chunk on my left side and still then I'm not all that comfortable bc my shoulder starts to hurt. So I flip over to my right side and 75% of the time that makes me sick to my stomach. Of course I can't sleep on my back bc little fatty Linn squishes my spine. I can only sit in one chair in te house that doesnt make my back hurt, but the butt part is uncomfy and makes my legs fall asleep. Speaking of legs... Restless legs syndrom. Yeah I thought it was bad before but now my legs are so much worse and randomly jerk. I'll be more than happy to carry Jameson in my arms all day than in the belly soon.
So see there all so many good things about being pregnant, but being pregnant can physically suck too! I wouldn't change it though. Ok it could be better, but I can only bitch so much until he starts moving and his daddy talks to him.
Jameson's worn out, sore, and fussy but smiling mommy
Carrie Linn
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